I normally have a positive attitude about my dieting experience so I apologize for being a bit down. 95% of the time I'm enthusiastic about it. I get excited when people ask if I've lost weight. I tell them about my diet and share my blog. But, the other 5% I don't like is stressing out about not losing any weight (or gaining it) and and passing up happy hour or drinks because I'm stressed out about having gained weight. Which lead to my breakdown yesterday. These weren't alligator tears, I'm really disappointed in myself for gaining weight. I'm scared that I'll gain more weight or that I'll gain all of the weight back. I felt that the 9 pounds I'd lost in 31 days was wasted on 0.9 pounds gained in one week. This fear comes from knowing that I'm pushing myself now, but how will I maintain my weight and reintroduce my social life? I'm passing up social activities in order to work out. I'm restraining myself from enjoying an adult beverage most nights. I'm denying myself things I enjoy and I really want it to pay off in the end.
Once my melter stopped, I got on the ellipitcal for 30 minutes. About halfway through my workout, Exit Music (For a Film) came on. This song is from Romeo and Juliet, but the lyrics resonated with me. "Breathe, keep breathing. Don't lose your nerve. Breathe, keep breathing..." All I need to do is take a deep breath, move forward and realize that losing 8.1 pounds in 37 days is no small feat. Sometimes I just need to be reminded of that.
Last night's dinner:
Honey-Balsamic Chicken - 4 points
WW recipe
Roasted Brocolli with Smashed Garlic - 0 points
skinnytaste.com recipe
Garlic Mashed Red Potatoes - 3 points
WW recipe
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